Life has been stressful since we have moved out here. Marcus does love his new job, but we both figured we would have made more friends and be standing on sturdier ground by now. Turns out that it is not that way. We knew the first little while would be hard, but we figured things would start to get easier by now. I guess not.
I am having a really hard time with the move out here. First off, I am finding myself with this pregnancy to be really emotional. Which isn't helping. I have never been more than a half hour drive away from my friends and family, where now it is around 3 to 3 1/2 hours to see them. It was hard to leave Mom and Dad's on Monday. Mostly because we are not exactly sure when we are going to be able to get out there again, let alone afford the gas for the drive.
Also, finances have been really hard. We are excited because Marcus is now on salary with his school, and we have HEALTH INSURANCE!!! YAY!!!!! Big blessing right there. But, what we budgeted out in the very beginning was way off, (not sure how that happened) and now we are really trying hard to make ends meet. In the mean time, companies are charging us double on our bills because we had to open new accounts, or installation fees, or what ever. So, we are getting a lot of expenses were weren't expecting. It is hitting us hard. Even though Marcus is making more than he has ever had, we are still struggling. I THOUGHT YOU GET RICHER WHEN YOU GRADUATED FROM COLLEGE. NOT POORER THAN YOU WERE BEFORE! ...guess we were wrong...
But, there is good news. Things will hopefully be looking up. Besides dealing with Dish, and phones that don't work, and of course the rising gas prices and being able to afford the gas to drive an hour to get to prenatal appointments, I did end up getting a job. I haven't started yet, but I will be working for the COOP in town. Yay! Hopefully that will make our budget a little more "user friendly" as I have been saying a lot today. Also, I found out that I can be a local substitute for the school and be a HEAD START bus monitor. Hopefully I can get those things started up soon as well. So, things will look up. Just have to give it a few weeks first.
Along with the blessing of me being able to actually help out around here with finances, I have so many other blessings that I keep reminding myself with. I have a wonderful family. Both my family and the family I married into. They have shown so much support with this move. Whether it is emotional support because we are lonely or financial support because we needed a little extra help. My parents are also being super wonderful by being a storage facility for us. Storing things like a bassinet, changing table, baby clothes, and so forth because we didn't have room in our car to bring it home. The support Marcus and I's families have shown us have been such a huge blessing.
Another blessing is the constant moving around I feel in my belly now. I am now 26 weeks pregnant and really healthy. I am doing great with weight gain (only have gained 2 pounds in the past two months, and 7 pounds total), Lydia is healthy, and I don't have gestational diabetes. Just the last appointment itself is a blessing. I am always feeling Lydia move. She kicks, punches, and even takes adventures up into my rib cage (which isn't always the most comfortable.) But it is a HUGE blessing to know that she is healthy. Especially after loosing two babies. She is our little miracle and she hasn't even arrived yet. She makes me excited for the future. :)
My husband is a huge blessing. He shows me so much love and support. He is much more independent than I am. I am very dependent on my family, and even though it doesn't make sense financially, he is willing to take a random trip (2 weeks ago) to go out and see my family just so I can gain a sense of sanity again. I am emotional and moody and he can read it. He knows when I need cuddles or when I just need time to myself. I can go on forever about how huge of a blessing my husband is. Including for being such a hard worker, but I'll spare you that.
The biggest blessing of all though is the fact of "He is Risen." Jesus did rise from the dead and he is alive! The sacrifice he did so we can all be with Heavenly Father again is a giant miracle. In Christ alone, my hope is found. Even when we don't know anyone, when we are facing changes and challenges left and right, and when we are far from the ones we love, the fullness of the gospel that I know and believe will never change. And that brings a lot of comfort to me.
Life is hard. I don't even feel that I can even really explain how hard life is for Marcus and I right now and have you be able to understand. But, even though life is hard, I still have all of these blessings of Family, My Husband, Our Future, and of course the Fullness of the Gospel which can be found in Jesus Christ.
"I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me." Philippians 4:13 NKJ
Some Pictures from Easter weekend. :)
Me and my wonderful mom, Janet
Marcus and I. Just think what Lydia is going to be like. Based off of this picture I don't want to know. :P
Finally a good one.
My family. Mom, Kaylin, and Dad in the background. Not pictured my my wonderful sister Jenni.
I hope you all had a blessed Easter. :) God Bless